Misadventures in Stock Photography: Part the 21st (Hello, Torso Guy)

Today I’d like you to meet Torso Guy.

“But, Chris,” you’re thinking, “couldn’t most of the guys in these stock photos be called Torso Guy?”

Why, yes, that’s very true. But usually they have something that stands out (not like that! sheesh), such as that candy cane in the very first picture I ever saw of Candy Cane Guy. With Torso Guy? His torso-osity is what stands out. Here’s one of the several very similar stock photos of him:

Torso Guy always had a

, drifting through the ladies as if drifting through


until late one night, when he was shouting, “

!” at a

, he realized that his life was at a

. Suddenly, in front of him,

, was a drop

(RRR)! RRR stared at Torso Guy, as if unable to believe that his

was finally there. Just like that, Torso Guy realized he was

, so he swept RRR away to his


…to be continued…

“Is there no end of the naughty boys, Mom?! Aren’t there any good boys out there??” -Mayhem

38 thoughts on “Misadventures in Stock Photography: Part the 21st (Hello, Torso Guy)”

  1. Oh my… lol!!! This one was very good Chris! **applauding**

    Mayhem honey, yes, Mommy is having fun looking at those nekkied boys…

    I think I did see a book of very black kitties for you… I think Mommy is trying to hide it from you…. go sneak off and find all those delicious kitties just for you!

    Hope you had a wonderful weekend Chris!!! Hugs to you honey!

  2. Whoa! “A tit bit nipply” is right. What the heck happened to get him “In the Mood”? That is some serious fuzzing going on. Perhaps date rape drugs?

    🙂 Happy Monday
    .-= Miranda´s last blog ..REVIEW: Sin on Skin =-.

  3. Nice work. LOL. The only horrific improvement would have been if one of the cover artist added long platinum locks or like I dunno, money sticking out of his jeans.

  4. K- Torso guy scares me in Wandering Heart. That’s just freaky. Although if you look at it closely his abs kinda look like a mouth and the circle around his nip is his eye. No, I’m not stoned just creative! lol

  5. Lovely abs and biceps, but I have to agree with some of the others – Torso Guy has some serious moobage going on. Looks like a B cup, maybe even pushing a C.

    And May…sorry, sweetie, there is no end to the naughty boys. 😉
    .-= Ava March´s last blog ..The Author Under the Cupboards =-.

  6. Wow! I have to say that I don’t mind seeing that torso over and over again. I’d like to see it up close and personal. 😉
    .-= Eyre´s last blog ..Hate =-.

  7. May, boys with torsos like that are always trouble. Its just something we’ve had to come to accept. Now a torso like my husband’s (which is minus the 6-pack) never brings trouble, just lots and lots of pet treats. That’s what you need to have chris look for, Italian/German men who love pets. Of course they aren’t photogenic necessarily so thus finding stock pictures of them is probably impossible.
    .-= Rebekah´s last blog ..Hello Dolly =-.

  8. ROFL

    OMG you are hilarious Chris.. “was a drop dead gorgeous Russian river rat”. LOL

    That “More Than Make Believe” cover is um… suggestive!

    I love misadventures.

    *waving at May* The good boys are few and far between sweetie…
    .-= Lea´s last blog ..In The Air Tonight =-.

  9. I think you could’ve called him pec-boy because those are some serious man-boobs there. Wow.

  10. Huh. RRR can keep Torso Guy, as far as I’m concerned. Not to my tastes… though it does make for an amusing MiSP post! (Are we REALLY on #21? Oh. My. Goodness.)
    .-= Nicole´s last blog ..May Goalpost =-.

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