Sunday Special Edition: The One with the Bat

I knew something was up when May got on top of a cupboard and started chittering at the corner behind the microwave. Then Chaos got on top of the microwave, leapt at the corner, and fell behind the microwave stand.

Oh oh. I don’t remember there being a tarry blob up in the corner like that…

Oh oh. That’s not a tarry blob at all…

It’s a bat!

Remember back in January of 2009 when a squirrel ripped a hole in my kitchen screen? I haven’t been able to figure out how to get the @!*#)@(*!! screen out to take it in for repair. And, since the kitties were taking care of any bugs that wandered through the hole, I haven’t been that concerned about that hole.

Until now. I’m going to get some thread and darn that hole so nothing larger than a bug can get in.

Anyway, back to the excitement. I sat down with my laptop and panicked via email to some people. (Many thanks to the calming online presences of Carolyn Crane, Bronwyn Green, Tam, and Lily, and to Jeanne who laughed her head off on the phone after everything was over.) Then I googled an article about how to get a bat out of your house.

Based on that information, I locked the kitties in the bathroom and closed my bedroom door. Armed with leather gloves and a towel, I put the towel over the bat and attempted to wrap him up. He got away and started to fly around as I hit the floor shrieking. When I looked up again, he wasn’t flying anymore and I didn’t know where he was.


By the time I figured out that the bat was in the ficus, he had taken off and started flying laps again. I crouched on the floor, trying to keep an eye on him in the living room mirror. Finally he hit the living room window and landed on the air conditioner, where I was able to drop the towel over him. (I’m glad that the article I read about removing bats warned me that he would squeak and chitter!!) Took the towel outside, tossed it on the step, and off he flew.


“My eyes are locked and loaded, just in case!” -Chaos

“Mom, that bug was really big and cool! You were mean to take it away.” -Mayhem

79 thoughts on “Sunday Special Edition: The One with the Bat”

  1. CJ: And once again, thank you for your supportive emails during my time of trial. 🙂

    AM: It’s only the rabid bit that I have trouble with! 😉

  2. k, trying not to laugh, but you will have to further let us in on how you got the bat out! Do you remember those old retro 70’s style woodstoves that looked like a mushroom lying top down? We had one at my gram’s, that 7-‘s enameled orange. It seemed that every spring a bat or two would somehow find their way down the chimney, through the pipe and out the stove! (these stoves did not have closing doors, just a mesh chain type screen) My uncle (a hand full of years older than i ) would grab a tennis racket or fishing net and end up chasing the thing till he caught it or the cat’s got it. (oh, and black thread will work great at the screen. You almost will not even notice the repair. can you tell i have done this before!)
    .-= turtle´s last blog ..da da da da da da today is my birthday! =-.

  3. My sister used to live in a huge old farmhouse with sketchy sealing, way out in the wilds of PA. It was common for her to have flying squirrels taking up residence in the walls, among other things. When I visited, I stayed in the main bedroom, which had the ceiling removed to give it a loft and a cathedral ceiling.

    One hot summer night, I hear this sound. It woke me up. Flapflapflapflapflapflap. Pause. Flapflapflapflapflapflap.

    I get up, turn on the light (across the room)–nothing in there. Hmm. Turn off light. Get back into bed.

    Flapflapflapflapflapflap. Pause. Flapflapflapflapflapflap.

    I try to ignore it. The sound continues for a while. Then I hear:


    and I feel something drop right smack between my legs, covered only in a sheet.

    I freak. But I don’t move. Can’t inhale. My mind is going, “OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGWHATISTHAT!!!!!”

    No sound. No movement.

    After a painfully long moment, I carefully pull the sheet taut, lift it slightly, and shimmy out from underneath, hoping I don’t dislodge whatever IT is.

    I take two of the longest steps ever and turn on the light.

    It’s a bat.

    My sister came to the rescue and released it out the front door.

    I slept downstairs on the couch the rest of the visit.
    .-= Jeanne B.´s last blog ..Oh, Fer… =-.

  4. A bat got into my place once in the middle of the night so I know how totally freaked you were! My boys (RIP) tried to catch it (which is why I woke up) but I did not want blood on my hands. I hid in my room until daybreak and called the City’s animal control (no help). Called my Mom for ideas and she called an exterminator who assured me he would remove the bat and release it.

    I found it was too late though. My jumper, Elvis, cornered the bat behind a cupboard. When he jumped onto it, the bat was crushed. The poor thing was removed.
    .-= Karen B.´s last blog ..We are everywhere! =-.

  5. If there is one thing I hate it’s bats, rats, pigeon and other such stuff..

    Other than the fact that it would “probably” burn your house down I would take a blow torch to it.. I know I am evil, I just hate those bloody things..

    After much thought I think Mayhem would roll over for a rub if you had an intruder – how blaise is she…

    Good for you Chaos – on the job..

    .-= Erotic Horizon´s last blog ..Monday Round Up: Slow and Steady I go…. =-.

  6. Yikes!!

    A mouse with wings spraying guano.. Such a great way to spend your Sunday.

    Well I’m glad your bat removal plan worked and you got the little bugger out..

    You stand guard Chaos!!

  7. Better make that hole really small. They can get in surprisingly tiny openings. Ask me how I know…
    We have lots of bats, being over the caves on the Miss. They eat the mosquitoes, so I like ’em.
    .-= Mary Lou´s last blog ..Lou Shoots Spring Shots =-.

  8. We got bats every so often when I was a kid – my Single Mother used to handle them with a tennis racket. In fact it is the only reason we owned a tennis racket.

    I do worry that your bat may have been a vampire bat – but I haven’t read a single good vampire book where the hot vampire turns into a bat so maybe not.

  9. OMG – your my hero. I would have so called someone in and paid through the nose for them to come get it out.

    I am such a girl.

  10. AM: We had nino de la tierra’s crawling out of cracks in the pavement after the big earthquake out here. Yick yick yick. Big fleshy ugly things with creepy crawly legs. Yeah, I’d take bats over that any day.

    Lily: @Val… I hate Google. Those things are ugly looking. Good thing I live in Florida, far away from them. Only have huge Palmetto bugs to worry about, oh and lots of different spiders.

    Oh, God, A.M., the earthquake would be bad right there without those things coming up right after it. The devil’s babies! I like that. And, Lily, you couldn’t resist Googling, could you? I never can. I regretted looking up “wolf spider” that a midwestern friend told me about, which we apparently don’t have in the west. But don’t those palmetto beetles look like gargantuan cockroaches? They might be about as bad, ha, ha!
    .-= Val Kovalin´s last blog ..Where do authors fit in on reviewer blogs? =-.

  11. I once found a nino de la tierra in the bathtub……while I was in it……taking a bubble bath. I let out a shriek and was out of that tub so fast. I guess I was pretty loud ’cause the neighbor came over to check on me a few moments later.

    I think I would opt for the bat.

  12. You could have done what my mom did when we were kids and a bat flew down the chimney – lay on the floor screaming with a tennis racket over your face. To this day, the pinging of a racket means many things to me… *grin*
    .-= JessaLu´s last blog ..Ten on Tuesday =-.

  13. Oh what excitement! I personally LOVE bats. I want to put up bat houses in my backyard, but we don’t seem to have many bats in our little town. But having a bat in the house is a bit different, although I still think they are pretty cool. And they eat mosquitos.

    I bet the kitties were very intrigued by their houseguest.

    I read an article an a magazine that they are finding quite a few dead bats around those huge windmills up in canada. Come to find out they are hemmoraging internally from the drastic drop in air pressure surronding the area of the wind farms. I find that fascinating that a clean source of energy is having a bad effect on the ecosystem. I need to investigate it more though as it was just a quick little article.
    .-= Rebekah´s last blog ..The Sushi Loop =-.

  14. Lovely. Bats are perfectly acceptable outside, not in the house. I think you might want to use duct tape on that screen instead of thread.

    And why why why did I google nino de la tierra? Nightmare city!
    .-= Lorette´s last blog ..Sunbreak =-.

  15. OMG…. I had that happen once, and I was not nearly as brave as you! (I called a neighbor to come and catch the durned thing). They are furry and creepy and not at all cool 😛

  16. We used to get bats in our third floor apartment when I was a kid. One night, of course when dad was out of town, one got in. My mom and I closed the bedroom doors and went into the living room to sleep. I can still see that little sucker, wings extended, crawling under the door to get us!! We ran shrieking into the night, and so did the bat – presumably. You are a very brave woman. I lose it at the sight of roaches, much les bats.

  17. Bats are cute. But even more importantly, bats EAT NASTY BUGS. There would be no complaining here as long as I was able to get the bat outside without the little guy getting hurt. (And given our high ceilings and determined cats, this might not be an easy task.)
    .-= Nicole´s last blog ..May Goalpost =-.

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