25 Things About the Cat Chaotic

Wow – I’m overwhelmed. Thank you all so much for your kind words about my Hourglass Sweater!

Not much going on here today – I’m working on a knitting project that’s a gift for someone who may or may not read my blog, so I’m erring on the side of caution and waiting a while to post about it.

Yesterday Mama Tulip posted her list of 100 things, which reminded me that I love those lists and that I want to do one for myself, too. But it’s going to take me a bit of time to work on that, so instead I shall give you 25 Things About the Cat Chaotic.

1. Chaos and his brother Diablo were born on September 28, 2003, to an unwed teenage mother (Riley).

2. Although I instantly named him Chaos, my brother named him “Hoho” and calls him that to this day.

3. Because Diablo was so evidently a boy and Chaos didn’t look like that at all, we thought he was a girl for the first ten weeks of his life. This doesn’t appear to have left scars on his psyshe.

4. Chaos weighs about 15 pounds. Even the vet agrees that this is a good weight for him.

5. He has a “jungle pouch” that he was born with, but is not a fat cat – he’s a muscley house panther sort of creature.

6. Chaos was diagnosed with Feline Lower Urinary Tract Disorder (FLUTD) in August 2005. This is controlled with a special diet.

7. He loves to play fetch.

8. The only acceptable fetch toys are sparkly mice (most famously SRM, who is still missing) and the little plastic pull tabs from the top of Silk Soymilk cartons.

9. Chaos forms attachments to blankets and articles of clothing, most memorably my green sweatpants. Just a few days ago I had to rescue a wool blanket that he was dragging around before it got too many fang holes in it. (Do you know how heavy a wool blanket is?!)

10. Of his kittenhood stages, the messiest was his Jackson Pollock Phase. This consisted of him finding my mug of mocha everytime I left the room, sticking his paw into it, becoming disgusted at the goop on his paw and shaking off said goop onto all surrounding surfaces, then repeating until I returned to the room. Remember that monstrous mirror in my living room? Very hard to remove mocha from. Also hard to remove mocha from my laptop, the carpet, the cupboards…

11. The second messiest stage was his Raccoon Phase. All toys and “found” objects were dropped into his water dish to see what happened, then fished out with much splashing.

12. Additionally, when he had a self-waterer, he would put his little kitty arms around it and flip it over to watch the water run out onto the floor. He no longer has a self-waterer.

13. Chaos is a binge eater. Whatever amount of food he gets, he will eat it all in just a few minutes. If it’s too much food, he’ll hork it back up.

14. Because of this, he gets fed three small meals everyday.

15. He starts to whine and become very pesky about 1.5 hours before feeding time. In an attempt to get him to quit bothering me, I tried an automatic feeder. In less than a week, he had figured the feeder out and could extricate the entire day’s worth of food. He no longer has an automatic feeder.

16. Chaos likes to hop back and forth over the head of anyone sitting on the floor. I have needed more glasses adjustments due to Chaos colliding with the side of my head than for any other reason in my life.

17. He is able to open my folding closet doors. Said closet doors are all secured with bungee cords, since he has not developed anti-bungee technology yet.

18. In the morning, prior to being fed, Chaos purrs louder than any other cat I have ever heard. I can hear him through my bedroom door.

19. Chaos likes to hang out in several places you wouldn’t catch most cats dead in: on top of his litter box and in his cat carrier.

20. He does not approve of crazy living room dancing and will jump around trying to nip my hands should I start dancing.

21. One of his periodic interests is trying to eat the couch. He bites it and tries to rip holes in it with his teeth.

22. Chaos never uses his claws on the furniture – just on his scratching post and cardboard scratcher.

23. He likes having his claws trimmed because he knows he’ll get a treat.

24. His “treat” is Fish Flavored PetroMalt, which he would get anyway to prevent hairballs.

25. Chaos loves tuna, but does not get to have it very often. He loves tuna so much that he will start whining and begging when I get out any sort of can or the can opener or even open the drawer in which I store the can opener.