Many thanks to Sydney, who helped me find the actual stock photos of our friend Slouching Open Black Jacket Guy. As you will see, the stock photos were particularly helpful this time. Shall we proceed?
Here’s the stock photo used in the next several covers. Carefully note that he is wearing jeans.
So… where did his jeans go?! And just whose lower body is that?? O_o
Maybe it’s safer to just leave those jeans alone and give him crazy blond hair instead?
Um, no. Not so much.
And is it
to be a
? SOBJG’s friend doesn’t look
on the idea, does he?
*blank stare* I got nothin’ for integrating this next cover into my little narrative. Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
Moving right along – let’s have another stock photo interlude, shall we? Again, carefully note that he is wearing jeans.
And despite attempts to get him to wear a
, he refused and instead slipped into something a bit more comfortable… and apparently emascualting. Because I don’t think that his lower half exactly looks male anymore in this next cover.
Thoughts? To help you in your analysis, here’s what SOBJG actually looks like in bikini bottoms…
“Mom, that poor boy has no fur at all! He must be so cold! I can’t bear to look at that poor cold boy anymore.” -Mayhem
36 thoughts on “Misadventures in Stock Photography: Part the Fifteenth (Slouching Open Black Jacket Guy, with Towel)”
I think you need to get this boys name and number – you are becoming obsessed now…
Even Mayhem is worried…
I loved Jenna Byrnes book with him on the cover…and whats that on his head on the cover of My Fair Monster..
.-= Erotic HorizonÂ´s last blog ..Weekly Geek â€“ Literary Work as Body Art!!!! =-.
He may well be deserving of the title ‘the most photoshopped’….
.-= mrspaoÂ´s last blog ..All the better to capture black cats with =-.
Some days your blog pictures are just icky. Listen to Mayhem! blek
.-= margeneÂ´s last blog ..Blue Monday =-.
Don’t worry Mayhem. The cold doesn’t seem to be affecting him at all…
.-= BrigitteÂ´s last blog ..Just Stuff =-.
I love those red undies. Ummm. He seems to have lost his manhood in that pic with the black trunks, especially when compared to his red package.
i bet that guy works out
.-= furiousballÂ´s last blog ..of sun and geese =-.
I wonder what reckless behavior led to that strange undies picture???
.-= Carolyn CraneÂ´s last blog ..My long and heartbreaking road to publication =-.
He sure does get around. 🙂
Poor guy though, I bet he’s not happy with the black bottom pic. Now the red one, yum!
I’m with Mayham! I have more hair on my chest than that poor lad.
.-= heideÂ´s last blog ..â€œSâ€ is for â€œSunday,â€ â€œShot,â€ â€œSore,â€ & â€œSisterâ€ =-.
Look at those abs!
(thank you, Chris. I know this post was just for me.) 😉
Ahem, I’m with May – much prefer the jeans!
Maybe he is looking down, because he wants to make sure that all the PhotoShopping hasn’t altered his assets!
.-= Seanna LeaÂ´s last blog ..pumpkin to cure my ills (and geekery) =-.
Look away, Mayhem, look away…
That was pretty cool to see the stock photos. Laughing at Seanna Lea’s comment re: checking out his assets!
BTW – I’ve officially become obsessed, I can’t stop thinking about “finders” thanks to you. I’m trying to figure out if I know anyone like that.
Yeah May- I like a little fur, too.
.-= LorraineÂ´s last blog ..It’s All Too Much =-.
The black swimsuit is definitely unflattering, ha, ha!
.-= Val KovalinÂ´s last blog ..Review Lift Me Up by Rayne Auster =-.
I keep wondering if the artist broke up with his/her boyfriend the night before and had a hate on for male people that day….
“I keep wondering if the artist broke up with his/her boyfriend the night before and had a hate on for male people that day….”
That would explain everything!
.-= Val KovalinÂ´s last blog ..Review Lift Me Up by Rayne Auster =-.
I wonder if these guys keep up with all the iterations of their photos. And wouldn’t it be crazy if one of them showed up in your comments?
Dear Chris, I am Slouching Open Black Jacket Guy with Towel. I love reading your blog and seeing my beautiful bod all over it. Those black bikinis though? Those are what I wear when I’m putting on that Disorienting Dress!
.-= wrenÂ´s last blog ..Vexations and Cockleburrs =-.
The redhead on Disorienting Dress doesn’t seem any more impressed with him than Mayhem is…
I think Amor in Retrogrado: Love in Retrograde is where you were going with that one. But geez the bikini bottoms in black? Looks like the blocked and colored a piece of his torso and pushed it down a little. Maybe he has a removable penis?
Oh my gosh, I am rolfmbo at everyone’s comments!
First, Mayhem may have a point. Although it does not seem to be effecting his package in the red… now in the black, I am a little worried… Eeekk!!
What a way to start a Monday.
Maybe the “Reckless Behavior” book involved a Lorena Bobbitt job.
.-= Cheryl S.Â´s last blog ..OZ Revisited =-.
Does May realize that he probably gets waxed to remove all his “fur”?
I’ve read that in underwear photoshoots, the man’s “goods” get taped up for modesty and a smoother line. I hope they get paid a lot, because that tape removal has to hurt.
.-= BrendaÂ´s last blog ..What to do when alone and a little bit lonelyâ€¦ =-.
Lol, and why did he have that towel in some of them, oh towel guy, you are so funny
.-= blodeueddÂ´s last blog ..Review: Queen of Babble in the big city – Meg Cabot =-.
I must admit to also being curious if the stock cover models ever go looking themselves up… and if so, would they be amused at the covers they end up on? Hopefully they would find these MiSP blog posts amusing, at any rate.
.-= NicoleÂ´s last blog ..Every other day of the week is fineâ€¦ =-.
The black bikini application reminds me of when I’m shopping online and there is a link to click to see a shirt in another color – and the garment all of a sudden loses all of its texture and drape.
.-= trekÂ´s last blog ..In which Neatnik is clingy =-.
Red definitely suits him *ahem*
.-= ErotRomReader JannaÂ´s last blog ..Mondays Hot Couple & Sexy, Smutty Scene =-.
You said something about jeans?!?!
Oh my! That’s all I’ve got.
.-= JulieÂ´s last blog ..Spinning & Knitting FO’s =-.
May, its okay, he’s not a real boy.
.-= RebekahÂ´s last blog ..And There Was a Great WaHoo! =-.
Hey! I had a dream about your cats the other night… I was trying to take a photo of them…
.-= lisaÂ´s last blog ..spring fling =-.
LMAO! The wonders of Photoshop can be good but very bad when you paste in the wrong genders body parts – “Reckless Forever.” I wonder if the cover model has seen that cover? Can’t be good for his ego, if he has. And “Disoriented Dress” looks fake [period]
Don’t blame you, Mayhem. Look away sweetie.
.-= Donna-FantasyDreamerÂ´s last blog ..Guest Post by Urban Fantasy Author Carolyn Crane & a Giveaway =-.
LOL! When Photoshop skills go bad. He looks much much better in red than in black. Speaking of which, there’s something really wrong about the lower body in Esprit de Corps.
.-= SydneyÂ´s last blog ..Welcome to Spring =-.
I love these!
May, I think the poor cold boy needs a cuddle!
.-= oranniaÂ´s last blog ..Trapped In A Restaurant Meme =-.
Ahem indeed. Theory #1: In black he’s got nothing, in red he’s got something and in Retrogrado it takes half a city block to cover his “real estate”. He is the prototype for a new toy, Mr. Potato Pants. Theory #2: In black he has the towel around his neck. In red, we cannot see the towel – perhaps it is, ummm, cohabiting the bikini briefs with him? Anyway, just dropped by to say I added a link to yarndex for the disco you asked about.